I haven't been posting this week because nothing's really been happening. That is, unless you count that yesterday I had a row in the street with an Eismann rep, I think I may have arthritis, I've bought a Kindle and for the last five days Isabel has been producing more poo than a cow pat factory.
The Eismann rep approached me while I was running late to the doctor's in the pouring rain, umbrella in one hand, shoving the pram with the other and the baby screaming like a child possessed. Not really the best moment to try to sell someone some frozen carrots. My feet and trousers were soaking wet because, by the way, the nearest pavement not full of pot holes is in Switzerland. Due to these extenuating circumstances, I may have sounded a teensy bit aggressive when I suggested to the rep that this might not be the best moment for her sales pitch. She came back with a very tart sounding Italian equivalent of 'ooooooooo, well excuuuuuuuse me, madam!'. Grrrrr. Those Eismann reps are out to get me. They were camped out on the street corner by my house for a couple of weeks until recently, but I managed to avoid them. The only people who are more annoying are those ones who ask you what the last book you read was.
On the subject of books, I'm a bit embarrassed about the Kindle. I did used to work in a book shop after all. And I love books more than Marmite and tea and toast put together. E-books aren't even that much cheaper. I may have lost my head a bit there. I've certainly lost a significant chunk from my bank account. Hmmm. I've since been ploughing through Amazon to find all the free downloadable books, which of course, aren't in a section labelled 'free books'. They're hidden among the other rather pricey books, cheeky devils.
Arthritis: I'm keeping a stiff upper lip about that. And stiff ankles, knees, wrists and fingers. Just kidding. I don't know if it's actually arthritis, I just know that it takes me longer to get up off the floor than it would Isabel's great-grandmother (hi Gran!) and that first thing in the morning I'm about as flexible as the Tin Man. That's why I was on my way to the doc's in the pouring rain yesterday.
There's nothing else been happening, except Isabel's remarkable poo producing capabilities which have shot right off the top of the merd-o-meter. Big G keeps telling me, however, that not everyone wants to hear about poo all the time so I won't go into details such as colour, consistency and smell. I'm dying to, but I think I'll just end it there.
By the smug look on her face, she's just done one right now. Trying to beat her own merd-o-meter record, the little minx.